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If the problem was just executives and managers, I don't think it would be so intractable.

My theory: the main reward offered in the office is the ability to hold other people's livelihoods hostage to their willingness to perform a role that supports one's own fictional identity.

So yes, it's the manager looking over your shoulder at your desk or the executive who boasts about the size of his skyscraper. It's also the executive assistant who puts the bug in their boss' ear that a woman is "unprofessional" for not wearing makeup. It's the coworker who complains to your manager that you're "not a team player" because if you go home to your wife they have no excuse for not going home to theirs.

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Managers and executives would also have to admit that many people would rather work at home because (shriek!) they *don’t actually like their jobs* and are actually *just working for money so they can eat and feed their families* and not for the love of their workplace or some received societal idea of “career progress”.

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Pro-office people are always going on about the value of 'spontaneous interactions' in the office. My question to them: "If these interactions are so valuable, why are you leaving them to chance?"

I honestly wonder how many _actually valuable_ interaction occur at the office. Did anyone ever keep a score? What about those interactions made that they absolutely can't be planned?

I don't think I will ever get an answer...

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You forgot to mention the "club" that exists in many an office I've worked in: the managers are able to get together and goof off on the internet or play a game on their phone… but if you lowly plebes gather at a cubicle to discuss the latest episode of must-see TV, there's an immediate, "Hey, if you have time to lean, you have time to clean" reaction from the same managers.

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My previous job was at a small commercial insurance agency. The entire company consisted of the owner, the primary sales agent and myself.

The owner operated on what I describe as a cargo-cult mentality of how an "office" should be run. By that I mean that they would spend excessive amounts of money on things because "that's what an office needs to have". For example they spent hundreds of dollars on a wall-spanning corporate logo sign to put on the wall facing the entrance door.

This for a company that had zero walk up business. The only reason anyone would ever visit this office was a) an existing client picking up paperwork or meeting with the agent, b) a new prospect, or c) one of our insurance company account managers visiting for a meeting.

The irony is that the owner is trying to get me to come back for contract work so they can take an occasional vacation, and their stance now is, "We'll pay you for 40 hours but you can just do what work needs to be done". My dude, that was my policy for 2 years, you just didn't know because (also ironically) you were never in the office.

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